Expresso Sex

After a good old drink with Nick and Michelle, I settled down in front of the television last night, eager to find some light entertainment. As I flicked through the channels, an informative programme about “Expresso Sex” came on. Now, I’m not familiar with the term (at 25 I’m plainly over the hill) and assumed it was some of of sexual activity indulged in over a strong coffee and a digestive biscuit. The programme kindly informed me it means a form of no-strings sex and, intrigued, I watched on. A bloke called Tristan was being interviewed. Hold on, I thought, he looks familiar… And the realisation spread that this was a bloke I was once at school with, usually shy and reserved, but now enthusiastically expressing his desire for expresso sex. I was shocked.
I was even more shocked when the tagline across the bottom of the screen appeared: “Tristan – enjoys expresso sex with other men.”